Wednesday, April 4, 2012

What? You Wanna Be Like Barbie?!

{Barbie's proportions brought to life: 5'9" 110lbs 39" bust, 18" waist, 33"hips.}  
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     Okay, so this is the reals!  Barbie is not a goal to live by.  So many people on tv and movies are doing their best to look like the World's Most Famous Doll but really - Look At Her!  She's unreal and terribly unhealthy!


     Can she drive a car?  Those legs are something fierce and lend true meaning to the phrase "Legs that go all the way up!" but how does she manage?  Her feet are way too small, so she would more than likely have to use a wheel chair or crutches to get around.  I mean, really!  Then even if she did walk, she'd topple over from her huge boobs!

     Speaking of breasts, her tiny back must be in so much pain.  I can't imagine how she gets around with that battle against gravity going on.  But then again, she has so many professions, maybe she performs her own acupuncture.

     Okay, let's discuss her arms; they're so long that nothing would fit her unless it was made specifically to her proportions- which are astronomical.  And then that waist!

     I'm waist envy, so maybe I shouldn't be the one to speak but her waist is too tiny; I can't imagine where her intestines are.  LOL  She looks sick, doesn't she?  Why hasn't her body fallen over?  When she stands, the top has to be pulling against her waist.  I think she'd have to wear a body brace, how about you?  Okay, now to address her cranium.

     Scientists say that the smaller the head, the smaller the brain, right?  So that means her mental processing must be equal to that of my grandson, who's two years old.  Her neck probably needs a brace for support and those shoulders....  Well, let's just say that if the rest of her body wasn't so jacked up, they'd work on the defensive line for the St. Louis Rams!

     I'm sorry, I don't want to be like Barbie.  She's got nutritional issues; suffering a calcium deficiency which means she'll suffer rickets soon; and there's no freaking way she is having a baby!  She's all wrong for the doll and definitely wrong for the human being.  I'm done with my rant now.  LOL

     I'm happy with whatever my body is left with once I'm to my goal!

Be HappyBe Healthy!

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