Tuesday, October 23, 2012

How I'm Feeling...

How I'm Feeling...

     Have you ever set out to do something?  Have you ever taken the time to plan, organize and motivate yourself?  Okay, so now that you've more than likely said yes to these; have you ever done all of said above and it didn't get you where you wanted to be?  Have you repeatedly tried and tried and all you've received in return are tears, cries of frustration and anger?  Now we're getting somewhere huh?

     What did you do after you threw your tantrum?  Did you say "I Quit!" and throw everything around the house?  Did you tell your cohorts, "It's my ball and I'm going home!"  Or did you sit and stare everything down, your mind already engaged in a form of retaliation?  Me?  Well, I'm the latter.  I throw my fit and then I look at it all, even my behavior, and start mapping out a new strategy.

     Last year, I weighed 245 pounds.  I was miserable, thought I was in a state of Peri-menopause and couldn't understand why I kept swelling up like a Sunday ham on one day and then exhausted the next.  I was in a state of depression and confusion.  I put together the idea of making myself a page to jot down my ideas and even make videos on them.  I wanted to share my struggles with others and see what it got me.  So, what was the result of all that planning?

     It first off got me this neat page.  LOL  Then I got a Facebook page where so many friends- 399 to be exact, joined me and gave me so much self-value and information!  I get up every day and see what's going on with them and in turn, they check me out!  I have words that come from a beautiful woman named Eileen Marshall (Hi Eileen!) and I get awesome information from a technical point of view like the page, The Science of Eating.  Then I have pages like The Size of My Life, Smiles and Rainbows: Positive Ways with Patricia Love and so many others, that help me feel better about who I am now while I transition into what I want to become later!  I would have quit had it not been for these people and so many others.  

     I learned a great deal about myself this year.  In 2012, even though it's not ever yet, I have discovered that I am truly in Menopause.  No dancing around it, no possibilities- nope!  I am a Hot Flasher and Moody Aggravator!  And it's alright.  I can deal because it adds to what I've been fighting against this past year, like weight gain, migraines and such.  So cool, right?
     I also learned that my thyroid as been super-duper low and that's why all of my efforts got me loss and then gain again.  It explains why I was developing swollen ankles and fingers, my headaches, my depression and many other symptoms.  It's a truly trying issue for me but now that I know, I have new ammunition.  This is my time to Adapt, Adjust and Move on!

     So as I prepare to move into the year 2013, I feel even more positive and ready for challenges.  I'm weening myself free of the medication my GYN prescribed me.  I am keeping my BP low and my Doc is proud.  I will get my TSH levels back on track and get this weight off.  I WILL get back into my skinny jeans and be healthy when I do it!

     Now this year isn't over.  We are now entering the time of year that's frightening to us all: Halloween candy, Thanksgiving trimmings and Christmas treats.  The thing is, I am not afraid.  I will see these things as the minor obstacles that they are.  By the end of this year, I know that I will be down in my weight again.  I will not stop.  I can't!  I will be down, be healthy, feeling great and looking good!  And so will you.

I know this!

Be Happy Be Healthy!

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